I Can’t Hear You

I can't hear youI’m that girl!  You know the girl who says she going to do something that doesn’t seem possible and then  the next thing you know she doing it. Before I decided to be that type of person I knew another girl like that and I found her incredibly annoying. I would think all the time how the heck did she do that. Then I decided to be like her.

Am I a suborn person? I would say not really but when I decide I am doing to do something  I don’t listen to anyone, unless they are telling me I can do it. But let’s go back a little bit. When  I was 16 I went to a Catholic High School in Brooklyn New York, sounds pretty safe, right? For a nerdy Caribbean girl it was no joke. With a funny accent and a tendency to make faux pas like asking

I don't look that stubborn do I?

I don’t look that stubborn do I?

for a rubber instead of an eraser, I became a target. Kids were threatening to beat me up for extreme nerdiness. I wasn’t used to dealing with that and I wasn’t going to deal with that. I found a college that I could attend early and get into at 16 years old. I had the grades, I was number 1 in my class. When I discussed it with my mother she said absolutely not. She probably said No God damned way, or over her dead body something final like that. When she made a decision that was it, she was hardcore strict, no talking back EVER. I don’t know what came over me I freaked out and started yelling and screaming, you didn’t yell and scream at my mother.

Next thing I knew I was on my way to that college, I have no idea how I accomplished that. I didn’t know how I did it I just knew I was going to do it.

The Finished Table

One of my pieces that saved me from my boring job

Fast forward to present day, well recent past. I had a very boring but well-paying job. I went home and would  furiously make Art and Furniture and then go back to my job were basically I tried to look like I was doing something all day. Believe me it was hard and stressful to occupy yourself mentally all day long when you aren’t doing much, not to mention trying to look busy. I know ya’ll are wondering what I was doing. Well, I was working in high end retail in store that would sometimes have 2 people a day coming in, really 2!

So after I sold some furniture and paintings in my own business I quit. I didn’t tell most people what I was doing I just did it and I was fine. Friends and random people would ask me wasn’t I scared, didn’t I lay in bed in terror over not being successful. No I was too busy thinking about being successful. I knew I had the grit in my body and in my soul to make this thing work, and I did. Yep I don’t tend to listen to anyone when I decide to do something unless they are helping me along my chosen path. When they explain to me I can’t do it all I hear I wah wah wah, like Charlie Brown. Does that make me stubborn? Maybe a little.